The Mother-In-Law Who Cried Wolf

I stopped by, with my son, to see my mother-in-law yesterday. We came by shortly before dinner time. My mother-in-law chose not to eat in the dinning room, so they brought dinner to her, in her room. It was a cheese dog, Italian wedding soup and pudding. My mother-in-law told them to take it away.

Her thinking was that at a nursing home facility that caters to the elderly, they really should have food that is more appropriate. I can see her point. Certainly I would think that something lower in fat and sodium should be available.

The staff was actually very nice and they were trying to see what they could find her instead. Egg salad was decided upon. She was told they would bring her an egg salad sandwich but she asked for it without the bread. Another member of the staff came back a little while later and told her that all they had were egg salad sandwiches, so that would be what they would bring her and she could take it off the bread.

I have to admit, the sandwich did not look very appetizing and it seemed to be scarce on the egg salad. My mother-in-law was not happy, but she did eat it (and then looked at me and said something to the effect of, “You see what I have to put up with here”.

The problem is my mother-in-law is like the boy who cried wolf. First, she is not always very friendly or nice about asking for something else to eat, or indicating that what they are serving her is not appropriate. In addition, whatever facility she is at, whatever they serve her, she has a problem. It is hard to know if, when she complains, there really is something wrong or if it is just her. And, while it may not be right, based on the way she treats the staff, they are not always so quick (or do not want to be so quick) to fix, or change the situation.

My mother-in-law needs to realize you catch more flies with honey than with vinegar. My mother-in-law needs to realize that things may not always be perfect, but they could be acceptable. My mother-in-law needs to realize that in order for her complaints to be taken seriously, she cannot complain all the time, about every little thing. And, my wife needs to realize that sometimes when her mother complains, her mom has a legitimate point.

It is these easy things that are often the hardest to do.